Freya's mom and I met 19 years ago when we were still young! She was a beautiful and captivating young thing. Like Edie Sedgwick, and I would love to say, without her problems, but sadly in true lemony snickets style, this is not the case, and hers is not a happy tale.
We went out, for a short while and then didn't see each other for a long time, during which her life changed irreversibly. She had experiences with drugs (who didn't), with alcohol (again who didn't) and she had some terrible experiences within her mind..
When Freya's mom and I met again, a mutual friend brought us back together, we had a great friendship and she was all the things she used to be. However, she did have some problems to deal with in her life, which seemed to pull us together over the coming months. Our friendship started as really hard work but became one which was fun and we spent some wonderful times together, this eventually lead to a fairly short relationship, from which a domino effect would start like I never imagined!
Freya's mom seemed fine and genuinely determined to settle in a relationship with me, and this made me comfortable about having another child. When she conceived with Freya and she couldn't contain her happiness, there was a whirlwind of excitement in the air and all seemed wonderful. The fun lasted a few short weeks though and unbelievably she started drinking heavily, then sadly she left me for another man, and then cut me off completely. When she was several months pregnant she called me, and told me everything was going wrong, and that she was back where she started. We spent time together and she had an awful time trying to put things back together, but she struggled to sort things out, and again she moved back to her partners home. This was a couple of months prior to Freya's birth and I was once again cut off completely, nothing but an email saying that I would be contacted by her solicitor when Freya was born, in order that a dna test could be undertaken to prove my paternity!
I heard nothing for months and my texts went unanswered. When I knew my child must have been born, I did a little detective work with my friends and discovered I was indeed the father of a beautiful little girl, one who I thought I may never meet. I didn't want to go rocking her moms boat and causing her to fall ill and wreck what could be the start of a wonderful life for them both.
But.... On the 9th of September 2010 I received a phone call from Freya's mom, asking me to come and visit as I had never met my daughter, and she was going to hand her over to go into care with social services that day. I could not believe my ears and organised a lift to her new home as quickly as I could.
When I got there I could not believe that she was back where she had been a year previous. But this time my daughter was in the middle of it, and after a short conversation, her mom asked me to take her away and to look after her. This is something we had discussed happening time and time again during the pregnancy, she was determined to try and be a great mom, but was totally aware that this might not be something she could do.
Anyway, I took Freya, with a little bag of clothes and a car seat, and that was it. We drove back to my home, I called social services and explained what had happened, and while we waited for someone to come and explain to us what had been going on in Freya's life, we settled her in and made her comfortable!
During the coming days I was made aware of a child protection order which was in place over my child, to keep an eye on her and make sure she didn't suffer from neglect. I found that the partner and mom had broken an agreement which stated that Freya would be taken into care, which meant if I had not been involved, I truly may never have met her.
Over the coming weeks there were several meetings held where we planned how Freya could be reintegrated to her mom, the original plan being to take her back on the following Monday, I felt that there was more to be looked at, but was over ridden by her partner and social services.
The following weekend I was contacted by Freya's mom who was having an awful time, making me aware of how she was feeling and how she was unable to cope or care for her child and that I would have to continue. I made social services aware once more, and as one thing lead to another, Freya's mom became more and more unwell. And made it impossible for me to hand her back over. After one key social services lead meeting, it was agreed Freya should stay with me and that I should apply for custody via the courts.
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